fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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