I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize