this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
It's rum buckets o'clock
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Is that strawberry winking at me??
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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