I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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