Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize