We're like a lot better than the average bears
Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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