i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
do herpes really smell.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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