peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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