I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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