tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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