Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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