do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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