Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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