Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
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This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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