she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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