omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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