Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(905): View more from Toronto

Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language

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(905): Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language http://tfl.nu/v1ob

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(937): View more from Ohio

I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!

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(937): I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser! http://tfl.nu/qe5c

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic

(414): View more from Wisconsin

USA! USA! USA!

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(262): i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic (414): USA! USA! USA! http://tfl.nu/meud

Replies (34) Good night (4681) Bad night (778)
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(817): View more from Texas

Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.

(818): View more from California

Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?

(817): View more from Texas

Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation

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(817): Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant. (818): Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring? (817): Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation http://tfl.nu/wbmb

Replies (8) Good night (652) Bad night (3673)
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(716): View more from New York

sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner

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(716): sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner http://tfl.nu/i2lb

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(305): View more from Florida

And the cops told us we were all naked.

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(305): And the cops told us we were all naked. http://tfl.nu/sk8w

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"

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(215): Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober" http://tfl.nu/vzc2

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(404): View more from Georgia

Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.

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(404): Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge. http://tfl.nu/3ppt

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(425): View more from Washington

What goes on in that head of yours?

(206): View more from Washington

Gay sex, for the most part. Why?

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(425): What goes on in that head of yours? (206): Gay sex, for the most part. Why? http://tfl.nu/64li

Replies (7) Good night (2116) Bad night (645)
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(315): View more from New York

Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check

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(315): Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check http://tfl.nu/umxm

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(479): View more from Arkansas

What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.

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(479): What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5. http://tfl.nu/zz72

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.

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(919): Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend. http://tfl.nu/ea08

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..

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(615): Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away.. http://tfl.nu/yxrc

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(540): View more from Virginia

I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal

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(540): I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal http://tfl.nu/b5ht

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(601): View more from Mississippi

At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.

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(601): At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by. http://tfl.nu/1wlf

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