so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize