This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize