She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize