careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
They took my balls.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Dicks are not precious.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize