That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
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