OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
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