he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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