my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
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I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
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The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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