That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
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sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
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We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
i've created a new STD.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
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