I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize