But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I need to stop coming to work sober
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
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