it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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