I'd wear matching sweaters with you
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
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