Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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