We're facebook friends in real life
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
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