her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
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We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
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It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
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