So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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