it wasn't lemon gatorade
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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