hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
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It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
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4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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