Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
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