Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize