I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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