She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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