i don't like sucking hair
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize