so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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