You really coming over, don't trick.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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