He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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