he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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