I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Come see our sink grown plant.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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