I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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