This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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