She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
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i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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