i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize